And so as the easter holidays commence and the little darlings are at home twenty four seven I have realised that Super Nanny Jo Frost is on repeat on E4...... coinsedence hmmm???????
Now I am all for disipline - bring back the cane if you ask me, however it can be a bit niggling when a woman who has no children of her own goes around telling mere mortals like you and me that we are doing it all wrong !! (Not a big fan, in case you hadn't guessed, nor a fan of that gina ford baby whisperer either, that book went straight in the bin after two days!!)
So my excuse for watching the show is that i love the idea that other mums out there are as screwed up with their children as I am with mine. Also i love the thought that compared to some on the tele, mine are actually little angels!!!!
However recently I have found myself repeating some of the well worn phrases to my children 'your behaviour is unacceptable' - at least I can say the word!! I have found myself using the naughty step and then chastising myself when I don't use it properly. I have been remembering certain techniques she uses and trying them on my children ...... arrrgggghhhhhh I have been brain washed, I am a super nanny disiple.
I really wouldn't mind if the technics worked but they don't seem to - or maybe I am just doing them wrong. Then there are times when you can't use the technics like the naughty step in the middle of the supermarket so you go back to the usual threats of loosing toys, treats tele etc... or you quickly move onto the cajolling and begging ' if you are good then you can have.......' . I bet there isn't a mum out there who is not nodding in agreement at this time.
I have tried star charts, treats, time out, threats, the occasional smack, the 'just you wait till your dad gets home' , the look, shouting, etc....... and yet i still get embarrasing behaviour at the most inopportune moment!!! For goodness sake I commanded the full attention of thirty school children with just a nod of my head (maybe thats a bit of a hyperbolic statement but you get the picture!!) why cant i get my two to stand still next to a supermarket trolley whildt I am trying to pay!!!!! why must they swing on the closed aisle sign, why must they run up and down trying all the seats on the other side of the till conveyor. why must they touch the shopping of the people in front. why why why???????
Taking a deep breath I try reasoning which just turns into arguing with a five year old - not a good look in a public place ...... cos I said so , so there.......... ner ner.
You gently take hold of the offending childs arm whilst gritting your teeth and faking a 100 watt smile at those people staring and under your breath you are muttering all sorts of horrible consequences to their actions, but by the time you get back to the car you have sort of run out of steam, the offence doesn't seem as bad and all you want to do is go home and maybe crack open that bottle of wine, or eat your body weight in easter eggs ..........
oh wait, maybe its just me..............
Super nanny please come quick I need your help!!
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